


Bernadetta von Varley's Bizarre Adventure!

by Shinnypichu88



Series: Doki Doki Academia [1]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Fucking Weeaboos!!!, Gen, Tags posted with every chapter!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-09-27 14:30:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20409325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shinnypichu88/pseuds/Shinnypichu88
Summary: Bernadetta Von Varley was in love!To think, someone like her could actually be marriageable! She could hardly believe it!She shouldn't have believed it. She was, as her late father had put it, an unmarriageable girl after all.





	Bernadetta von Varley's Bizarre Adventure!

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Healing Broken Hearts](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20341129) by [Angelheart61601](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angelheart61601/pseuds/Angelheart61601). 
**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a revenge fantasy.

"What a beautiful night," Bernadetta thought as she skulked through Garreg Mach Monastery on her way to the dining hall. She loved nights like these the most. Everyone tended to check in for the night earlier, and that meant that there were even less people around than usual when she went out to eat. She got hungry too sometimes! Besides, less people meant that there were less people walking about, and less people walking around meant that the chances of anyone killing her was even lower than it would have been had there been more people around!

Granted, the changes of her dying in a place such as Garreg Mach Monastery were rather low. The literal psychopath was more interested in Edelgard right now, not that Bernie would ever know that.

Just the way Bernadetta Von Varley liked it, ignorant to the real danger she and the rest of her classmates were in.

"I wonder what's left..." Bernadetta mumbled to herself as she arrived at her destination, the dining hall, and opened the door.

A scream was all it took for Bernadetta to realize that this night had been a mistake.

"Agh! It burns! You bitch!" A tall, muscular man, who would put Raphael to shame, cried out in pain. It would seem that Bernadetta had knocked his, very hot, drink from his hands when she'd opened the door. Now the drink covered his white shirt, and it was all her fault!

"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry, you've really done it now Bernie!"

"Sorry isn't going to cut it you, You, YOU!"

"AAHAHHH! PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!" Bernadetta cried before sprinting back to her room. She ran with speed that would have made Felix jealous. However, this isn't how the story ends.

The man was seething.

This, this transgression would NOT go unpunished! He wouldn't allow that BEAST to get away with such an unwarranted attack on his person!

"Look at that Jinguru, that stupid beast just messed up the tallest's favorite shirt!"

"Indeed Beru, someone should kill her!"

"And by someone," Jinguru began.

"We mean us!" Beru finished.

"No." The angry tall man mumbled "I, Ultra Instinct, will not forgive this transgression. Bernadetta Von Varley will pay dearly for her crimes. VENGEANCE SHALL BE OURS!" He roared.

It was a good thing everyone was asleep, or his comments about a certain noble might have been concerning. Even still, that one redheaded sociopath we mentioned earlier had heard him as they were making their way to the sauna.

"…" She glanced in the direction of the dining area, noticing a certain moron's big shadow, and tilted her head. Pff, and Solon called her hopeless. Feeling happier than she had in years, "Monica" skipped her way to the Sauna for some much-needed relaxation

"But boss, I just remembered," Jinguru began, no one had noticed the redheads gaze, "Isn't she on the list?" Beru finished

Ultra Instinct looked them dead in the eyes and said: "No." He said certainly "Not anymore."

Why did the rightful inhabitants in this world have to bend down and listen to the cries of THEIR tool after all? Foolishness, utter foolishness. That brat needed to be reminded of her place, he'd be killing two birds with one stone!

Thus began, _Bernadetta von Varley's Bizarre Adventure!_


End file.
